surrender (sols)

{I made this.}

Art is always good for the soul. Especially on the last official day of summer, which for me was last Sunday. I spent the afternoon playing with something new: mixed media art.

I had no plans for what I was doing.

I was a bit of a mess and a whole lot of joyful.

I trusted something was emerging one step at a time.

I liked it this way.

I've been considering this question for over a year: What is mine to do? In my car door is a scrap of cardboard with What is mine to do? written in black Sharpie marker. Each time I pull my door shut, my fingers brush the rough cardboard. When I open my computer screen, there is a digital sticky note blazing What is mine to do? On my bathroom mirror, in my journal, on the washer, What is mine to do? infiltrates my day. I've become accustom to finding moments in the day of things that are most certainly mine to do.

However, I've been thinking perhaps there are many answers to this question. In the moments of the day and also in the dreams of  a life.

This summer, from all aspects of my life (Christ-follower, momma, friend, adoption advocate, abolitionist, writer, teacher, reader, speaker), I've been nudged by someone to dream a little. To think outside of the box. To go beyond the planned. To imagine possibilities.

I never would have guessed building a little mixed media art canvas might be the way I'd see a bit of light illuminating a hidden path. Maybe, just maybe, mine to do is something unexpected.

I have no plans for where I'm headed.

I'm a bit of a mess and a whole lot of joyful.

I'm trusting in a God way bigger than me, for something emerging one step at a time.

And I like it this way.

I think the word for this feeling is surrender.

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