Goodbye 2014

I've been trying to figure out how to write this post, but there just doesn't seem to be a succinct way to write how I've been missing for too many weeks, after a promise for stories during advent. The long and the short of it:

I'm not sure what happened.

We got sick -- me first and then Andy -- and that kind of rocketed our little world out of alignment. It did, however, remind me of how we are a well-synced team and it takes both of us to make things work. 

Christmas season is a tough one for our kids. There's a smash of emotions all whirling for attention inside of young bodies. As parents who have adopted children with a hard history, you find yourselves stepping carefully, trying to keep emotions from exploding. It takes extra time, but it is time well spent.

Then we got a dog. There's a story (of course) and one I've promised myself to write, so stay tuned to meet Kate.

My parents got stuck in Hawaii and so I picked up their dog from the kennel. Buffy is an old dog, but she tolerated our new puppy. Buffy was happy to be with us, having more energy than we've seen for many months. But, as the day went on, her energy level dropped.

By that evening, Buffy's body shut down as my parents were flying across the country trying to get home for Christmas.

We held her and loved her and were so glad she was with us and not in the kennel.  Not that it made it any easier to say goodbye.

This was our Christmas season: 

new and old

beginning and ending

traditions and adjustments

slowing down and speeding up

pushing away and pulling together.

It was a season of unexpected blessings found beneath days that didn't go how they were supposed to go. And somehow in the midst of it I lost my footing in this public space for writing. Even this turned into an impossible blessing. First, I didn't stop writing, words are being stacked in my next book. Second, I realized the dear friends I have who checked in on me.

Goodbye 2014. You were a good year.

A Favorite Wedding

Image from Instagram #lakercole @melissa_jordan4

 Andy and I went to one of my favorite weddings ever. My friend Cathy Laker married Nate Cole and their wedding was perfect. Here's why:

It was a joyful celebration of love -- love here on earth and the mighty love of God.

I am reminded of the goodness of God. Cathy waited a long time to get married. She learned to live single. She learned to hold on to God in the hard. She learned to become the person she was created to be.

Her wedding was an outward expression of the overabundant blessing she's experienced. It was a celebration of the way God is dependable and gives exactly what we need and more.

Sometimes I wonder why we have to walk the hard of life. Celebrating with Cathy and Nate yesterday gave me a concrete understanding of the why. Cath was the most excited bride in the history of brides. Her energy was contagious and her joy filled and spilled out of her heart.

And I realized, without the hard, the celebration wouldn't have been nearly as sweet. Without the hard, the joy wouldn't have been as abundant. Without the hard, the goodness of God would have paled.

When we walk the hard, trusting in the goodness of God, the celebration is abundant -- absolutely over the top -- because God is mighty and loving and gives good and perfect gifts.

Always.

Impossible Friendship

This year I have been given the gift of friendship. I was caught in a trap of believing I wasn't a good friend, that I didn't really have friends, that I was fine without friends. Early in the year, the Lord released me from this ugly snare and has given me many good gifts of friendship.

I am so very thankful.
And a little sad. 
I missed some years of good friendship and I've realized it takes time to clean up the mess.

I hold fast to core of my faith --

God is good. Very good.

And in his abundant goodness, he has blessed me with more friends than I dared to imagine. They have permeated my life as a teacher and coach and writer and speaker and mom and community member and wife and church-goer.

My friends are genuine and real. The relationships go beyond the surface and into meaningful, faith-filled encouragement and support. I'm in awe at the number of friends who care about me. It doesn't seem possible.

They span generations and genders.
They spatter the globe.
The spin into my story and offer solace and goodness.


God reaches down, cups my face and whispers, You are not a friendship failure.

Then, as if he needs to punctuate his point, God does the friendship-impossible.

He restores a long lost friendship.

Being reconnected with Jodi is the over-the-top evidence I needed to know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I am not a friendship failure.

When I think about the way friendship is thriving in my life, I see the goodness of God. He's been wanting to give me good gifts of friendship, but I was stuck in a trap and unable to receive these gifts. It was scripture that positioned me to receive the gifts of God. Scripture provided clarity. Scripture set me free.

I have the friends to prove it.

Straight from My Notebook

Sometimes life feels like it is too much. We feel BLAH. Overwhelmed. Tired. Tattered.

And it is. It is too much. I can't fix all of the things that go wrong.

I think this is right where Jesus wants us. He never promises that life won't be too much. Suffering happens.  When we are living for Him, we are guaranteed suffering.

So, when life gets overwhelming, what do we do?

1. Rest
2. Move
3. Read Scripture

Instead of drowning in life, I drown in Scripture. God speaks while I read.

Instead of being restless, I rest. God heals while I sleep.

Instead of moving to keep up, I move to exercise. God restores while I move.

These things, coupled with prayer, make a difference. The give me resilience to trust Jesus. He has my best interest in mind. He will not withhold any good thing from me.

And I will not withhold any need from Him.